[Slowhand] Blackie Replica

[Almighty Geetarz]

"I noticed the other day, a guy calling himself Finerareguitars, was 
selling a replica Blackie on ebay. He had, like the Fender custom shop, 
taken a lot of care to line up all the scratches, wear and tear, etc, 
even using the one odd tuning key, etc. however his price was a slightly 
more modest one, starting at arond £400 I believe. Now however, his 
listing has mysteriously disappeared. Has Fender leaned on him I wonder?"

------------

One of my hobbies is cruising eBay and enjoying some of the wretched 
"relic" jobs offered there.   As one viewer commented about an 
instrument "looks like it was banged about by a drunken hillbilly!".  
I've got quite a collection of photos of  "bad relics", so many of those 
knockoffs are done so poorly that one wonders if the folks responsible 
have even seen a *picture* of the real thing.  Heck, even that is 
charitable, because someone competent who had never even seen a worn 
guitar, could likely still figure out where wear would be more likely. 

Just a few weeks ago I greatly enjoyed torturing a seller who advertised 
a black American Standard that he had, ahem "reliced" as a copy of EC's 
blackie, and I won't bore non-players with the details but let's just 
say that in most ways other than being strat-shaped the American 
Standard is closer to a Les Paul than it is a vintage strat as just 
about every single component and measurement is different! 

So yes, to answer your question, Fender does police the eBay listings, 
and in particular the word "relic" is a trademark, as are a few others, 
(Strat, Stratocaster, etc.)  and they will (thankfully) have those 
listings pulled.  Some of the few sellers who *do* create excellent 
replicas (Bill Nash, Greenwich Village, etc.) tend to use certain 
code-words in their listings so you have to know what to look for.

If you want some laughs for today, here are some samples ... like Huey 
Lewis sang in verse "cool is the rule, but sometimes, bad is bad ...":

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-01.jpg

This one's great as the bottom has been attacked with a sander but the 
nasty poly finish is still glossy:

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-02.jpg

Check this one out, the person who did this *had* to be drunk or high 
when he went after this guitar with the sander:

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-03.jpg

Here's a "copy" of "blackie", I've heard of playing high notes but never 
seen anything exactly like this before, this is the American Standard 
idiot ...

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-04.jpg

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-05.jpg

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-06.jpg

This one is not as bad, but still shows that poly is really only useful 
on bowling alley lanes, and doesn't age well on guitars, and will 
*never* age like nitro:

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-07.jpg

SRV used to wear kimonos on stage, this next body is like new and 
glossy  ... except the player must have been wearing a sandpaper kimono:

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-08.jpg

This next is what happens when you try to "relic" a cheap-ass Mexican 
reissue strat with a poly finish into an SRV look-alike ...

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-09.jpg

Screw it, I just want to sandpaper a guitar and don't care if it doesn't 
look natural:

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-10.jpg

And last but not least, here's what EC's "Blackie" would look like, if 
he had long arms like an Orangutan:

http://www.geetarz.org/axes/bad-relic-11.jpg

Folks, you can't get this kind of entertainment on TV.  For real 
stupidity - try eBay!

~AG