From nicholas at nicholaspyers.com Thu Dec 11 08:40:14 2008 From: nicholas at nicholaspyers.com (Nicholas Pyers) Date: Fri, 12 Dec 2008 00:40:14 +1100 Subject: JOKE: The Birds & The Bees [100/5 A] Message-ID: <38B7397A-6CDC-4ADD-B936-C7F048D28276@nicholaspyers.com> [Thanks to Noel for this gem] -------------- next part -------------- A non-text attachment was scrubbed... Name: Unknown-1.jpg Type: image/jpeg Size: 26462 bytes Desc: not available Url : -------------- next part -------------- A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees. 'I don't want to know,' the child said, bursting into tears. 'Promise me you won't tell me.' Confused, the father asked what was wrong. The boy sobbed, 'When I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech." "At seven, I got the 'There's no Tooth Fairy' speech." "When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech." "If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for. -- Nicholas Pyers (nicholas at nicholaspyers.com) "Heaven on Earth?" "No, Earth on Earth. The Just Earth!" From ecooper1 at optusnet.com.au Thu Dec 18 01:35:48 2008 From: ecooper1 at optusnet.com.au (Euan Cooper) Date: Thu, 18 Dec 2008 17:35:48 +1100 Subject: JOKE: The Online addiction poem 4/5 Message-ID: You just awake, your eyes are still shut Still cant quite focus, still draggin' your butt You know you need coffee, can taste that first sip You wait for the maker and put the mug to your lip The feeling is warm, just what you need But you know you need more and its something to read The paper you say? No, don't think so. Not it... It's much more exciting, you cant wait to "click"... You boot up your 'puter, you click that icon... Can't keep from grinning, you're really turned on! When the voice says "Welcome", your heart skips a beat!! You know your addicted ... All the friends that you'll meet. And then you see it, you wait with a stare.... The mail box lights up!! "You've got mail" waiting there!! OH, what a feeling!! You look with delight! You hoped you'd have mail and you knew you were right!! So you go thru the mail knowing this is the "Best".. Reading this reading that ... As you go thru the rest. Some you give the "delete" key, others get your first click You know you must hurry, you gotta be quick! It is then that you hear it, you can't wait to see Your heart gets a flutter, who's name will it be? And then there it is, covering part of the screen The sweet little sound ... Oh, you know what that means!!! "Quick mail check" you promised, you said in your mind. But you just got an IM and your pressing for time! You know that you want to and respond you will So you stop what your doing and go for the thrill! You "LOL" and "BRB", give kisses and Hugs... You type and send words, refilling your mug You give your good friend your attention and time So that quick little mail check turns to hours online !